Welcome to Dungeon Master 101, my new Dungeon Mastering course based on over 30 years of experience. In this series I will share my failures and successes and the lessons learned along the way. In this episode, I will cover player awareness. This includes inadvertently triggering players, understanding boundaries, reading the room, and a player’s responsibilities.
Transcript
Intro
Welcome to the first DragonLance Saga, Dungeon Mastering 101 episode! It is Linaras, Fleurgreen the 21st, my name is Adam and today I am starting this new Dragonlance Gaming series all about Dungeon Mastering. Inspired by a Dragonlance Setting episode I released this past week. I received a comment asking if I could help the situation in the game that I was calling out, and this is the result of that comment. The Graphite Dragon shared some wonderful insight on the topic and what follows is a collection of our thoughts.
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Discussion
First and foremost we must accept personal responsibility for our actions and thoughts. We are independent, autonomous human animals with a myriad of chemical differences as well as cultural, social, religious and ethnic backgrounds. Our perceptions of issues, even among similar individuals, vary dramatically. No one group or tribe is a monolith. Understanding this fact should lead you to celebrate different perspectives and be able to tolerate them, even when you fervently disagree with them. Trying to stifle discussion in any forum is a tactic of weakness and control.
The purpose of a Dungeons & Dragons role playing game is not to have dominant control, even when referring to the Dungeon Master. It’s about a shared experience that is guided by the Dungeon Master. It’s about playing and shaping a game for FUN. I understand that my philosophy on gaming may differ from yours, and I welcome you jumping in on live chat to share your thoughts. We can have a bit of a back and forth throughout the course of this episode.
If we can all agree to be responsible individuals that are getting together to have fun, I think we are starting from the best possible place. Let’s move on to discussing today’s topic of Player Awareness. Briefly first, I would like to share my personal experience with role playing gaming.
I started playing role playing games with the Dungeons & Dragons Basic set. My brother, sister and myself would play it often. In middle school a couple friends introduced me to Advanced Dungeons & Dragons. From there we bounced to Middle-Earth, Star Frontiers, Star Wars, GURPS,In Nomine, Vampire the Masquerade and Werewolf the Apocalypse. We even created our own role-playing game called Cross-Genetics, based on mutants ala Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. With more than 30 years of playing and Dungeon Mastering, I feel like I have a little to say on the subject. My most successful games were Star Wars Saga Edition, Dungeons & Dragons 3rd Edition Dragonlance Campaigns, and Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition games. By the time 4th edition came out I had wrapped my head around the importance of narrative and collaboration. Two essential elements of a good group dynamic in gaming.
I would like to begin the discussion by bringing up my five tips for every individual playing the game or running one:
1. Know Yourself As A Player
Let’s start first with a Player’s self awareness. A player should know their own hangups or triggers. Knowing yourself is the most important aspect of being a good player, as well as being a healthy adult.You should know what bothers you or sets you off. If you cannot control these emotions, you should remove yourself from the game. If during the course of the game, you are faced with your particular triggers, it is incumbent on you to talk to the DM and other players in privacy to share your thoughts and concerns. Remember, this is a collaborative game, it is as important to ensure everyone is having a good time, and you are not the only important factor to the game. If you cannot handle the content. Excuse yourself for a short break, or ask for a group break to address the issue clandestinely. If you are open and honest You would be surprised how relatable your issues may be and how understanding and accommodating other players can be.
2. Do Your Due Diligence When Building Your Group
Part of planning for dungeon masters is to speak with the players in private, not only to understand what the player expects out of the game, but to share your expectations as well. It’s important to understand that not every player fits into every campaign, and if someone doesn’t fit, delicately let them know. Alternatively if you want to run a game, sometimes it’s best to alter the campaign slightly to be more accommodating to your players. Part of what separates a good Dungeon Master from a great one, is their ability to adapt to the players. As DM you should know the ultimate skope of your game and consider your initial plan may not be the best one for all players. Be open for constructive criticism and a player’s decisions and experience.
3. Understand Group Dynamics
A good group dynamic may look to Tuckman’s stages of group development. Forming the group means members may need to relinquish the comfort of non-threatening topics and risk the possibility of conflict. When group members start to work with each other in the Storming phase, they start to learn about individual working styles and what it is like to work with each other as a team. Tolerance of each team member and their differences should be emphasized as without tolerance and patience the group will ultimately fail. It is up to individual players whether they work through their differences. When they reach the third stage of Norming, Resolved disagreements and personality clashes result in greater intimacy, and a spirit of cooperation emerges. However there is a danger here that members may be so focused on preventing conflict that they are reluctant to share controversial ideas. Having confidence in yourself and the ability of your fellow player’s is essential to having a healthy group dynamic. Finally in the Performing stage, the group is able to focus on the game and working together, rather than focusing on each other. Many long-standing groups go through these cycles many times as they react to changing circumstances.
4. Don’t Try To Be Edgy For Edginess’ Sake
Understanding, that as a DM, you will never know the intimate minds of your players, nor do I think you should want to, you should be respectful of social norms, not just when dealing with the game but when dealing with other people. Traumas are real. Phobias are real. You should not try to grandstand and challenge everyone’s perceptions during a game. You should not try to replicate an MA rated themed series or film, unless it is clearly stated up front and you know for a fact that all of the players are on board. The Dragonlance Chronicles and Legends trilogies are arguably written at an 8th grade level. They contain mature content but address it in a respectful way. If you insist on bringing mature themes into your game, consider the approach the Dragonlance authors take.
5. Always Consider The Golden Rule
Finally, remember that this is just a game, and as much as you want it to be epic and memorable, you ultimately want players to come back for the second session. So consider the golden rule: treating others as one wants to be treated. You want a game that you will be able to share how heroic your hero was, and the challenges your overcame with the other players. You want to feel like you are part of a living, breathing world that is vibrant, dangerous and exciting. Not a perverse dream that repulses you.
Now, what do you do if someone in your group starts reacting to your game? What are some techniques you can use to prevent a situation from turning bad to worse?
1. Be present as a Dungeon Master or fellow Player.
If you see that someone is showing signs of distress or discomfort with a situation, call for a bathroom or snack break. Don’t call anyone out individually. And as a DM, be prepared to stop the game for any reason. Whether it’s the doorbell for pizza delivery or a player with a personal issue. Be accommodating and make a written or mental note where you are in the situation and step away from the table. Sometimes a little air is all that is needed to prevent angry or hurt feelings from developing. When you do take breaks, talk about something other than the game. Something light. Tell a joke or humorous anecdote. Hell, talk about the weather. Then when everyone seems ready, sit back down.
2. If you sense someone is angry and they start acting out, stop the game immediately.
Tell the Players or the Dungeon Master that the game is no longer fun and you either need to work through the situation or end the session altogether. I have ended games when I am clearly no longer in the headspace with my players. They all were gracious enough to understand, and the offending player actually waited for everyone to leave and apologized after I expressed my frustration. Now, not everyone will be able to handle that situation. Sometimes groups fall apart. It happens. Accept that the dynamic has changed and move on.
3. Be willing to voice your differences and walk away
When you notice a game moving into a direction you are uncomfortable with or simply do not like. Express your dissatisfaction. In most cases the group will be accommodating but on occasion, you may need to accept that you are not a good fit for a group any longer and allow your desire to play the game be overruled by your peace of mind. At the end of the day, you are the only one that has to live with yourself and compromising your values should never be on the table when playing a game.
This is all well and good when you have a planned session, what happens when you are in a pick up group? How can this change the dynamic?
Simply put, apply all of the previously stated techniques in the same way. Accept that you do not know what is going to happen, you do not know the sensibilities of the other players or DM, and you either accept what unfolds, or you do not. But always be willing to walk away or voice your opinions if you have a problem. It is healthy to stand up for yourself and consider your peace of mind first and foremost. Keep in mind that games only work with the cooperation of an individual’s willingness to collaborate and compromise. If you are unwilling or unable to do so, avoid the situation in the first place.
Lastly I would like to talk about Content warnings or Trigger Warnings. If you use the tips and techniques previously outlined they are completely useless. As you have already done the heavy lifting of knowing yourself and the group. If however you are streaming your game or sharing your game with an audience of any sort, it only benefits you and the audience to put out a content warning. In the same way as any movie or music album would alert the viewer or listener in what to expect, you should as producer or DM, alert the audience in what to expect. If you do this, you will not have to change your play style at all, as you will avoid having viewers react negatively about the content in which they need not subject themselves. Know full well that if you are online, you will have a fair amount of trolls and shit disturbers no matter what you do, so accept that reality before you release any content.
Outro
And that’s it for this inaugural episode of Dungeon Mastering 101, Player Awareness! Do you have any tips or tricks based on your experience as a player or Dungeon Master? Was I off base on any of my suggestions? Feel free to email me at info@dragonlance-saga.com or comment below.
Thank you for tuning in. Don’t forget to like and subscribe to this channel, ring the bell, and you can support this channel by becoming a Patron on Patreon, a Member of this YouTube channel, and you can pick up Dragonlance Gaming materials, using my affiliate link. All links are in the description below.
This channel is all about celebrating the wonderful world of the Dragonlance Saga, and I hope you will join me in the celebration. Thank you for watching, this has been Adam with DragonLance Saga and until next time Slàinte mhath (slan-ge-var).
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